The New York Times is reporting that women in their 20s with steady jobs in big cities — New York, Chicago, Boston and Minneapolis — make more money than their male counterparts. This is fabulous news, but unfortunately these same women are finding it hard to date men who earn less than they do.
From the article:
They would say, “Wow, you’re so sophisticated,†she recalled. A first look at her apartment, a smartly appointed studio in a full-service building in TriBeCa, would only reinforce the impression. “They wouldn’t want me to see their apartments,†she said, because they lived in cramped surroundings in distant quadrants of Brooklyn or the Bronx.
One of them, she said, finally just came out and said it. “Look,†Ms. Hess recalled him saying, “it makes me really uncomfortable that you make more money than me. I’m going to put that out on the table and try to get over it.â€
But he never got over it, she said.
“The sad thing is that I really liked the guy,†she said. “If that hadn’t been an issue with him, we’d probably still be dating.â€
Why are so many men threatened when the woman is the breadwinner in the relationship? Tami can be my sugar momma any day!
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Posted by heartofjosh
I don’t have a problem with the girl earning more than I do, but I do have a problem when they act all high and mighty.
What’s the deal with the lady in the article that gives her bf a hard time for trying to save money on a flight, and says she’ll only fly first class. Sounds like a damn snob to me.
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Posted by lilkitty
I think she’s the exception in the article. The rest seem like they try to hide the fact that they make more, but if you’re in any kind of serious relationship the truth is gonna come out eventually.
My suggestion is not to hide it. Why hide that you’re a young and successful woman? They should be proud of the fact that they’re successful and find men that are confident enough to love them for who they are and not what they make. Guys that can’t deal with the girl earning more have ego problems. I know many couples where the woman makes more and the men aren’t tripping over it.
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Posted by JustAZN
It’s only time until women find themselve capable of living on without men.
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Posted by yume
“It’s only time until women find themselve capable of living on without men.”
Are you in the stone age still? There are plenty of single women that are doing completely well for themselves without a need for a man.
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Posted by elysa
I have some female friends that make more money than their husbands and it is surprising to see the changes in the way they handle money.
I think for me it doesn’t really matter who makes more as long as they both have similar views and goals about money. If the high money earner is also a serious spender then it doesn’t really matter because chances are she will be left with less money at the end of the day.
I have read a few articles about women making less money than their male counterparts for the same position so it is nice to see articles like this.
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Posted by daniiiel
Being totally honest, I would find it uncomfortable if my girlfriend was making more money than me.
But I guess because being brought up in a korean family, and growing up with the idea that the male must take control financially for example has really been drilled into my head.Don’t get me wrong though. I’m not agreeing with that korean traditional idea, but I’m just really used to the idea and I think it would subconsciously bring down my self-esteem or bring “shame”. Yes, I know, too much pride. Not a good thing, but it’s the way I was raised! =_=
But again, in the end, it all comes down to a common goal between the partners. If they can agree with that, then there’s really no problem who makes more money.
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Posted by vgachi57
Let’s step back and consider a different scenario. Opening a jar of pickles. The man can’t do it. The woman can. Is that shameful? A man who separates his whites from colors in neat, organized stacks before carefully applying fabric softener. A woman who burps/farts loudly in public.
None of those scenarios is unthinkable. But they are outside the stereotypical social norms assigned to each gender. A few people here have stated that they wouldn’t mind if their female partners earned more money (and I wholeheartedly agree) but unfortunately that is not the social norm of much of the world’s patriarchal society structure.
That’s not to say the trend cannot change, but it’s not surprising that it still happens today. Sociology is fun!
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Posted by dagobert
I really think it’ s in natural order, women have always been working harder than men, since school actually.
It’ s just that for a long time, women were concidered made for the housewives carreer.
I don’t think women would ever be equal to men in the career area, cause they’ ll soon be superior :-D.
Women powaaa (i’m a man actually).
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Posted by keith_wyk
i really like the fact that women are being breadwinners.
Seriously now, I’m speaking as a man.
Now men can get to sit down and relax while their wives are slogging off at work. What couldn’e be better than that?
Man.. what a pathetic world it has been -
Posted by Dar-Ling
well, I’m learning business now in my college and according to my lecturer, in the modern business world now, women are gaining more power and control. It is said that if the business world does not revolve around women, it will go down. well, I guess that the world is evolving. No longer men are the high power and dominator while the females have to follow in pursuit.
The thing about men not being able to accept the fact that women are the breadwinner, I must say that it’s part of overwhelming ego in them as well. But of course, not all men are that way and you can actually find a lot of men right now having no problem being the one stayin at home while the ladies work and make money.
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Posted by AllaN
That is bittersweet news. Women are hardworking, and I supposed they deserve the success. Im glad that women are starting to make a lot of money, but that means men are making less, and means its harder to date those women.
I hope this isn’t the case for Toronto.
-AllaN -
Posted by Poulain
Hm, I’m not sure if I’d have a problem with it or not. I guess men have had the kind of outdated, antiquated stereotype of ‘provider’ placed on them for so long. It’d make me work harder though that’s for sure!
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Posted by jon
I think this all stems from an insecurity from guys - either they feel less manly because they don’t fit the old scheme of the head of the household or they fear she will eventually look down on him for his supposed lack of success (unfortunately, we often equate success with salaries). Either way, isn’t it silly for insecurity to ruin an otherwise great relationship? I think the key is that our salaries are just one other personal trait: within a couple, there will always be one that is funnier, one that is more attractive, one who is smarter, one who is more understanding, and one who earns more money. Who cares which one it is? As long as they don’t flaunt it or belittle the other, it shouldn’t be a problem, no? Rather naive-sounding, I know, but I think it’s really the crux of the issue.
Although, I do wonder, for any divorce lawyers out there, does alimony work in the guy’s direction???
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